When You're Letting Go of a Piece of Your Heart {Motherhood}

I opened the white, front door of our family home and stepped outside. Cold morning air hit my face and I remembered that it's not summer anymore. September is here with a hint of fall and changes with it. Down the stairs and a few steps onto the street, I was trying to remember the shopping list that was his first school year's necessities. Lunch box, sneakers, uniform, light jacket, and snacks. I reached for the handle of the car door and reminded myself that I wasn't going to cry when I will be dropping him off in a few days. I will smile, wish him a good day and tell him that I will be back soon. I won't make it a huge deal and inflate this out of proportion but at the same time, I will make this milestone a little bit special. I reminded myself to add another thing to the list and drove off.

My big boy, my first born baby is going to school, pre-k to be exact. To some it may be just another trip down the road but for me it was an end of an era. It's the beginning of the end of innocence, carefree childhood and flexible bedtimes in the middle of the week. It is what so many mothers experience this time of year. 

It's a time to embrace the new and remember the old. 

It's a time to give yourself a pat on the back that you've made it so far but to roll up your sleeves and get to work on their homework. 

It's a time to clean out their room and help them settle in their dorm room, while leaving a twenty dollar bill under the rug for a rainy day. 

It's a time to give yourself a break when your last one boards the bus and waves you good bye, leaving you home alone not sure what to do with yourself.

It's a time to give yourself permission to have a good cry and watch a sappy chick flick in the middle of the day, then throw some pizza in the oven and call everyone for dinner. 

It's a time to make homemade cookies when they come back from their first day. 

It's a time to settle down and buckle up, to face the reality of your kids' abilities and push them harder to reach for more. 

It's a time to let go of the extra curricular activities that break up your family time, make your head spin and your hands reach for fast food more times then you should.

It's a time to plan family meals and listen to their conversations.

It's a time to invite the Lord into your morning devotions with your kids before they board the bus.

It's a time to encourage them and uplift them

It's a time to pray for them while they're away 

It's a huge change that brings painful and joyous moments with enormous challenges.

It's an adjustment of routines, bedtimes, shopping lists and budgets. 

It's an expansion of our hearts to find the space and strength to forgive those who will hurt our babies, those who won't understand them and those who will reject them. 

It's an appreciation of those who take the extra time and put extra effort in their success because let's face it, we can't do it alone. 

When you are letting go of a piece of your heart, let God take over. Trust Him to take you through this uncharted territory of firsts - first unaided written letter, first A for enormous effort, first totally failed exam, first oppositional college professor and even first love.

As moms we go through a lot and we all go through similar situations. We all need each other to learn from, to share with and to uplift. It's a tough job and we shouldn't be going at it solo. Find friends who will encourage you, who have gone through similar situations and those who will uplift you in their prayers.

Mama, you are strong, persevering, tough,  unbreakable and courageous. One who wants her child to not just follow the rules, but follow God Himself.

Let me take your hand. And stand with you.

Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged, for the LORD your God will be with you wherever you go.” Joshua 1:9

Setting Right Priorities Will Make Your Life Blessed

I recently read some discouraging news about a public figure I admired for years. It simply hurts reading that people you thought were strong and faithful, fall prey, yet again, to the age-old attacks from Satan. It's just so discouraging. If they couldn't make it, what are the chances of me making it in the long haul? Slim to none. Yet, I have the Lord on my side, He is the one who guides and leads me through the valley of the shadows. 

After I read about yet that couple getting a divorce, I started thinking what went wrong. Why did something that God destined to serve as an eternal example of His love ended up breaking into pieces? Why are they not sticking with it? Why are they not putting more effort? Why quit? Why?

I know I am not perfect. Far from it. I have to constantly remind myself of what's more important and why I'm doing what I'm doing because there plenty reasons to quit. Yet, one of the important things I learned in my life is that priorities are what separates people from successes and failures. The way you set your priorities is what makes you, who you are. Basically, whatever is the most important to you, you will love, cherish, spend time with and invest energy in.

Question: What are the most important things in your life?
I was recently reading a few articles about habits and routines of highly successful people and one thing stood out among all of them. They all make something a priority, make a plan and set out to pursue that goal. They narrow down the most important things and only focus on those, while ignoring the distractions and developing themselves in that direction.
Successful people focus on something and make that a huge priority in their life, then work very, very at getting to the point of achievement. Whatever it may be, emotional, spiritual, financial or social prosperity is a matter of priority. It doesn't necessarily make those priorities right, because people pursue all kinds of things that aren't worth the time. But one thing remains the same - setting priorities in correct order will make your life blessed.
God is looking for people who will put Him first, and I don't mean going to church. Making the Lord a priority, means that everything else will follow only after the relationship with Him is fulfilled. It means you don't start a job, build a family or get a new friend without consulting with the Father. He ultimately is your source of strength and wisdom for all decisions. He is the number one priority in your life.
Priorities are what drives us to pursue the life we will eventually live, blessed or completely destroyed. The choice is up to us.

Managing your time wisely and employing personal discipline to pursue the correct priorities will make all the difference in your life. Putting action into your life towards the goal you set out to pursue will release the blessings God has promised to those who love Him. When we make our relationship with Him a priority, the Lord will bless and prosper us in a way we haven't even imagined. The relationship with Him is absolutely worth it all.

Nobody is too busy, it's just a matter of priorities.

Fear {Motherhood Challenges Series}

Motherhood is a challenging task. It makes you take an honest look at yourself and evaluate who you are as a person. Of course, none of us can reach a point where we have corrected out bad habits to the point of perfection. In addition, every child needs to learn from his parents how to grow, learn from and deal with difficult parts life.

Fear is one of the biggest motherhood challenges. It's not the fear of my son getting hurt physically (nothing can stand in a way of a toddler) but the emotional pain that I may cause, or who he may grow up to be, or the future that expects him. 

A lot of times, I fear what I'm doing isn't enough or wrong, and I start doubting my own abilities as a mother. I fear he will grow up to make some awful mistakes or will hurt other people. I fear that I'm not patient and tender enough to show God's love everyday. I fear that he doesn't see the loving and ever-bearing parent I want to be. I fear that something I do or say will impact him forever and he won't recover from the consequences.
As mothers we face the reality of life every day and want to protect our children so much more but we cannot. What we can do is ask God to cover all our inabilities and insecurities with his love. It's not that we won't make mistakes, but we know that God keeps our children in His hand and in whatever we're lacking, He will fill up. Whatever we can't do, God will finish and whenever we mess up, He will give mercy.

Fear disables us from moving on and cripples our ability to love fully, give our all and do great things. God doesn't want us living in a constant state of desperation and tragedy, better yet he has a plan. We just need to trust Him and let go. He knows the present, he has been in the past and every child has a future. When we do our part, he will take care of the rest.

There is no fear in love; but perfect love casts out fear: because fear hath torment. He that feareth is not made perfect in love. (John 4:18)

A Thankful Heart + Inspiration Monday Link Up

With Thanksgiving behind us and Christmas in full swing, my heart is just so full. I'm thankful for so much in my life that it's hard to express in words. I'm so thankful for this life I've been given and the countless blessings in it. I'm so glad for the tradition to set this day aside and just rest (although some of us have to cook all day long which takes some work;-). It is so good to get together with family, eat lots of deliciousness, see all the children run around (and get a little bit cranky) then take a nap (or two). The best part is sharing it with the ones we love, focusing more on meaningful things in life and less on materialistic.

In the spirit of thankfulness, I challenge you to an attitude of gratitude. Each day from now until the end of the year, choose one specific thing to be thankful for every day, write it down and thank God for it. Make it a priority to be grateful wherever you are, no matter what the circumstances may bring. Live it everyday, choosing not to worry and stress out, instead focus on the good things in life, Count your blessings and as a result you will gain a thankful heart.

Priorities + Inspiration Monday Link Up

We all have priorities in life and it's really easy to determine what they are. Just take a look at your life and examine it. What do you do everyday? What do you spend the most amount of time on? That's it. That's your priorities. I've been thinking a lot about this lately. Frankly, I'm trying to get better at time management, and that's where knowing my priorities comes in handy. 

I've been focusing on the baby, then my blog, then the church ministries, then the house, then my DIY projects, then myself, then my family, then my friends... and then my husband. And that's just not right. In the very beginning of our relationship, there was this unsaid feeling of high importance. We were important. He was (very) important to me. And although I'm doing all these things (supposedly for him) like cooking, cleaning the house, taking care of our child, spending time on a date night (maybe once a week), really I have put him last in my train of thought (sorry babe). I've made excuses; I got angry, blaming him for our relationship's pitfalls. 

Yes, I know he's a grown man and very capable of taking care of himself. But it's not about fear of spoiling my man, it's about the love I want to nourish and keep for years to come. He is the most important person, my best friend and the love of my life, so it's only logical that in order for me to keep the fire burning and have a lasting relationship with my other half, I need to put more effort into our relationship. 

The lesson of the day is, that if you think something is important, you will find time, money and opportunity to get it done. That's just a fact. So if there is anything in your life that you let take a back seat and haven't paid so much attention to, listing countless excuses - stop it. Decide today and make a conscientious effort to improve things, figure out what will get you (and keep you) motivated... and then make things happen.

Patience {Motherhood Challenges Series}

 

Would you believe me if I said that I get frustrated with this cute little face and run out of patience? 

Well, it happens more than I like to admit. 

Patience is not my virtue and I will be the first one to admit it, but motherhood has brought a whole different perspective on it.

Having patience and practicing it is not an option anymore. It's simply something I have to do on a daily basis or I will loose my mind. 

As a mother, the primary caregiver and teacher, I become frustrated and impatient.

I know deep inside that he's still very little, he doesn't understand what 'no' means, or that he needs to wait 15 seconds for me to make his bottle. 

Yet it's still hard not to loose my cool. 

It's hard to be patient and still have discipline, to understand his little mind and not get frustrated at his inexperience, to teach him everyday tasks without getting annoyed with his forgetfulness.

Sure, he's cute, and sweet, and adorable, and fun but he still has his moments and it takes a lot of motherly patience and discernment on how to react and what to do when his mood strikes.

I ask the Lord to give me patience but then find myself frustrated and angry with the next situation if something doesn't go the way I planned or envisioned. 

We ask God for patience, but really it isn't something God can just pour on us. Patience is learned with time and age, it's something we conscientiously have to choose and act with, something we have to practice everyday. 

Therefore my prayer is not for God to give me patience. My prayer is to know God, and how He loves us, to show Him in my everyday life. He has so much patience and long-suffering with us, where many times we don't deserve it. 

God really knows us, yet has enough patience to let us come to Him, and let us learn and grow, without force or constrain. 

Learning to love like God does is what going to give me strength to have enough patience for my everyday life.  No matter what life brings.

Thoughts On Turning Twenty Five + Inspiration Monday

 Whenever you pass a big milestone in life, it makes you stop and think. You are either satisfied and happy with what you see your life becoming or completely disappointed.

Turning twenty five isn't that big of a deal but still, it's a number that shows I'm approaching thirty (it's a dirty word in vocabulary). It is a milestone and a turning point that certainly got me thinking.

Am I doing something with my life to serve God? 

What have I achieved?

Am I in the center of God's will?

What are my goals and dreams? 

Am I headed in the right direction spiritually, emotionally and socially? 

What kind of memory and legacy will I leave behind?

I mean, there is a lot to consider. 

One thing that I'm sure of is I'm blessed. I have more than I deserve and ever would've of dreamed of to have. In the petty little every day problems, I seem to loose the sight of the big picture, of God's enormous blessings in my life. 

Life is good when it's shared with the ones you love. It's even better when you invest your life into others and help make some one's life better. I do not want to live for me and mine, just doing what's necessary for my family. I want to help others beyond my front door, to love people and serve any way I can. 

If I say I have no regrets, I would be lying. There are things I wish I would have done differently, and advice I would've have listened to, but it's not what's important. Important thing is to move on, to grow, to change things that I can and to accept things that I can't.

I want my life to matter. I want it to leave an imprint on someone else's life, to show others what love of God really means. 

Do I fail? Sure... I burn out, I struggle with things, I don't have enough faith and I get discouraged. Doing the right thing isn't easy. Sometimes it feels lonely and sometimes I don't want to do it at all - I want to throw in the towel and quit. 

Life isn't all roses and pretty pictures. Life is hard and behind every face there is story, there is hurt, there is pain and there are those who help us go through it all. I want to be that person. I want to help people, to leave a lasting impression on life, to do something that matters, to leave a legacy that's worth mentioning in a eulogy. 

I want to...

learn to love people like God does.

forgive and truly let go

move passed disappointments

inspire others to do the right thing

be thankful

have mercy with people

serve God with my talents (as little or much as I have)

help people through the storms of life.

be soft spoken
being able to admit that I'm wrong and change 

raise responsible and God-fearing child(ren)

I don't want to... 

quit because it's hard.

get bitter

forget God's blessings and mercy

worry about tomorrow

be judgmental 

live carelessly

be angry
lose sight of what's important 

Life is a gift so we need to start living like you are only given today because nobody is guaranteed tomorrow.
Thank you for reading and God bless!
Join the link-up party below and spread inspirational words and encouragement!

October {Budgeting Series}

plaid shirt - $14.95 (H&M)
brown boots - $33.95 (DSW)
black booties - $24.95 (Old Navy)
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TOTAL: $73.85

I can't believe we are in November already... The cold weather is upon us and I'm not a fan already. Honestly, when I sat down to calculate my total for this month, I could not think of anything else I bought except these three items. 

Well, technically I bought more (it was my birthday month after all) but ended up returning most of it. Like these Coach booties that I found in TJMaxx were gorgeous and comfy but the soles seemed too thin for winter. Also, the J.Crew crossbody had so many scratches on it, I had to return it. It seemed to have a very poor quality leather material.

I'm so happy I stayed withing my budget ($100) and to be completely honest, it's getting easier to do so. I'm forcing myself to wear everything I have, remixing and styling in different ways. Also, controlling myself at every sale sign and especially in Target helps a lot. Thinking critically about every piece and 'do it NEED it' or 'do I WANT it' approach is helping me avoid unnecessary purchases.

This month I'm all about winter staples which are going to last me for years to come. Since I have some gifts from my birthday, this month's shopping should be really fun. Will report back after Thanksgiving. 

Hope you have a great day, be inspired to stay withing your budget and link up below! 

For Better and For Worse

When I go through perfectly edited blog posts and see nicely done family photos, I start to think that some couples have it all together. Their kids look great on Christmas cards and their Instagram accounts are just a mile-high pile of perfect corners of their house. How do they seem to have it all and I have a snotty infant and a messy kitchen? 

First I got jealous but then I got real. We only show what we want on this little space and paint the image we want others to see. It goes with everything from clothes to children to bedtime stands. Yes, great images and perfect posts help build following and people may PINterest the heck out of your images but that's not real you they see. They see a version of you, and usually it's the best version. 

I, for one, don't have it all together. There are times when I feel discouraged by the smallest following ever, feel angry at my husband for not being a bit more sensitive and run out of patience with my son. We are far from perfect and that's something I want to share

We started as any couple - full of dreams, hopes and aspirations. I really thought that we were different than everybody else, that our story was special and the love we had would keep the fire burning forever.          But I was naive, young and very wrong. 

Fire will not keep burning unless you keep putting firewood into it. If you keep burning on the first love logs, soon the fire will die and you will be left with nothing but cold coils. 

Behind every outfit, lovely smile, and baby picture there is always a story.

The cute pictures of Jonathan at the park have a less then perfect behind the scenes story. 

We started the day off with nice family breakfast and as I was cleaning up, hubby went outside to rake leaves. The weather was gorgeous and I thought we could go for a nice walk. I asked him, and he said, later. Fine. Later it is. (I probably had a little bit of attitude there)

I thought we would go the park near by, take some pictures of Jonathan, enjoy the warmth of the autumn sun and just hang out as a family. My husband on the other hand, thought that I meant walk around the neighborhood. So we were bickering and getting impatient about who said what, and in the process, I forgot to grab diapers and a bottle for Jonathan

Then, of course, I had to do my make-up and hair and was taking a little longer than he thought was appropriate amount of time to get ready to go to the park. 

(We have very different ideas about time limits, apparently)

As we got into the car and drove off, I realized that the stroller was still in the garage, as I took Jonathan for a walk the day before. We had to turn around and go back for the stroller, as husband reminded me about my absentmindedness yet again.

Needless to say, by the time we got to the park, we were in less than pleasant mood. 

But those are the times when it takes some work. 

It takes a calm and gentle voice of one person to bring the other one back into the good place. To remind yourselves, that everything is OK and the most important part is that you are together. 

I have to admit, it's not easy. Sometimes, I fail at being gentle and calm and blow up like a hot air balloon. Other times, I'm full of love and good intentions and nothing seems to bother me. 

Life is full of those moments. But it's the ability to learn, to moved passed it, to enjoy life in every way, to laugh at the weird parts and to forgive each other for the mistakes. I'm still working on that.

After all, we sighed up for better and for worse.

Inspiration Monday Link Up

Hello Lovelies!

This is sort of a new chapter for my space on the world wide web and I'm happy to announce that it's not just skin deep. It goes further then that.

Ever since starting this blog, I didn't want to just have an outfit/day and some cute remarks but truly an inspirational space where people can come to and gain ideas, share thoughts and generally be uplifted. Life of outfits is just one side of me and there is so much more that I want to share. 

There are many important issues needed to be discussed and moments to be shared that I don't want the time to go buy without changing the world my corner at least a little bit. 

I don't know much but what I do know is that people want to feel like they are not alone, like others are going through similar problems and too don't have perfect Insta pictures. We are part of a community and as women, need to encourage, uplift and strengthen each other. There is enough negativity and darkness in this world that a little bit of inspiration is all we need to make this world a better place.

So let's get to it, shall we?