I have been thinking a lot about what have I accomplished. Not just in the last year but in my entire life. Looking at other women my age and those even younger, at those with, what seems like, better marriages and celebrity-worthy closets I got jealous. I started feeling pity for myself because I don't have a thousand people following after two years of blogging, every item in my closet does not have a J.Crew label on it, my husband is not a freelance photographer who takes pictures of me for living and my baby's outfits are not Instargam-worthy.
I'm just a married girl with baby in tow who has a blog. I write half legible sentences of incoherent thoughts and post pictures of simple outfits. That's it. I'm not sensational or original. In most cases I look to Pinterest and other blogs for inspiration. I carefully plan out all of my blog outfits and take a million pictures of baby for that one cute grin.
And so I've been feeling sorry for myself just a little bit for a couple of reasons. I don't have a career and I'm not rising to the top of corporate ladder. I haven't made a huge following for my blog and I don't have very inspirational thoughts. I don't have a 'wow factor' with every outfit and I cannot afford Valentino rockstuds. (Google it if you must). Feeling like I don't have anything to show for my life, like I haven't accomplished much has taken over me.
It's easy to feel inferior and like a looser by looking at other people's blogs, families, business, children or what have you, through the prism of social media. Most of the time we do not see the whole picture. We get caught up in the covetous state of mind because let's face it, our culture pushes for it. I see a lot of 'currently coveting' posts and none 'look I'm happy with what I've got' posts because we are always looking for more. That makes us compare our lives with others' and when it doesn't line up with a tiny snapshot of reality, we feet like we failed.
That is absolutely not true.
Behind heavily edited pictures, polished looks, staged family photos and perfect lighting there are people. People who have faults, who fail and who don't have it all together because I surely don't. And that's OK. It's OK to be ordinary and just myself. It's OK to be living an ordinary life, raising babies, loving my husband and growing old. It's OK to be grateful for what I have and do the best I can with the life that God gave me.
For we dare not make ourselves of the number, or compare ourselves with some that commend themselves: but they measuring themselves by themselves, and comparing themselves among themselves, are not wise
(2 Corinthians 10:12)