Motherhood is a challenging task. It makes you take an honest look at yourself and evaluate who you are as a person. Of course, none of us can reach a point where we have corrected out bad habits to the point of perfection. In addition, every child needs to learn from his parents how to grow, learn from and deal with difficult parts life.
Fear is one of the biggest motherhood challenges. It's not the fear of my son getting hurt physically (nothing can stand in a way of a toddler) but the emotional pain that I may cause, or who he may grow up to be, or the future that expects him.
A lot of times, I fear what I'm doing isn't enough or wrong, and I start doubting my own abilities as a mother. I fear he will grow up to make some awful mistakes or will hurt other people. I fear that I'm not patient and tender enough to show God's love everyday. I fear that he doesn't see the loving and ever-bearing parent I want to be. I fear that something I do or say will impact him forever and he won't recover from the consequences.
As mothers we face the reality of life every day and want to protect our children so much more but we cannot. What we can do is ask God to cover all our inabilities and insecurities with his love. It's not that we won't make mistakes, but we know that God keeps our children in His hand and in whatever we're lacking, He will fill up. Whatever we can't do, God will finish and whenever we mess up, He will give mercy.
As mothers we face the reality of life every day and want to protect our children so much more but we cannot. What we can do is ask God to cover all our inabilities and insecurities with his love. It's not that we won't make mistakes, but we know that God keeps our children in His hand and in whatever we're lacking, He will fill up. Whatever we can't do, God will finish and whenever we mess up, He will give mercy.
Fear disables us from moving on and cripples our ability to love fully, give our all and do great things. God doesn't want us living in a constant state of desperation and tragedy, better yet he has a plan. We just need to trust Him and let go. He knows the present, he has been in the past and every child has a future. When we do our part, he will take care of the rest.
There is no fear in love; but perfect love casts out fear: because fear hath torment. He that feareth is not made perfect in love. (John 4:18)
Thank you for writing this Anna. Sometimes I worry I'm not patient enough, strong enough, good enough as a mother. So thank you for the reminder!!! It's hard to "let go and let God" but I know we're supposed to!!!
ReplyDeleteAmber
Fashion, Floss and Lip Gloss
I love how you put all of this as I have struggled with the same almost everyday or every other day since being a parent. I worry to much about what others think about me and fear rejection as a "good parent" I know there is no perfect mom or dad or even child but God is perfect and an awesome parent. I just need to anticipate and trust that He knows what's best for us as the father and model that and His love. Have a good rest of the night. Rachel xo
ReplyDeleteGreat post and awesome series Anna. I am now catching up with your blog and I loved reading this. All your mommyhood-related posts are awesome and raw. I can tell you are an awesome mom and having fears is normal. Some things are out of our control.
ReplyDeleteHave a Great Weekend. Ada. =)