When that precious babe is placed into your arms, the emotions and feelings are overwhelming. You feel joy and pride of being a parent. You are scared not to hurt him/her while caring, changing and feeding. You aren't quite sure what you are doing (yet). A few days go by and the baby is sleeping all the time. You congratulate yourself on having the perfect child and try to get some sleep yourself. And then it happens - they wake up, start crying, have colic, diaper rash, spit up and gas. So much is happening that you forget the last time you brushed your teeth because that tiny human being has consumed your life. Here are a few tips on how to survive the first three months, which (in my opinion) are the hardest.
1. Let Go of Expectations
It's so hard to not have expectations and for perfectionists (like me) it's hard not to expect more. First few weeks babies eat around the clock and it feels like all you're doing is feeding, changing, feeding, changing. And that's exactly what's happening. Give yourself a break and don't expect to have everything figured out right now. Don't expect to have an orderly house and dinner from scratch every night - you will be too exhausted to care what you eat. It's OK to just let go and enjoy that little babe because time will fly by way too fast (trust me).
2. Have Patience
Babies are fussy little beings and sometimes you have done everything possible and he/she is still crying. They may be hungry after you just fed them, and pooped the minute you changed the diaper. It takes a lot of patience to just go with the flow. Don't get angry but try to calmly figure things out, even if sometimes there is nothing to be done. Be patient with yourself because you are new at this and everything new takes practice. It takes time to figure out why they are crying and what they don't like. Even if this isn't your first baby, remember they are all different.
3. Laugh Often
The baby pooped on your bed as soon as you took the diaper off? Laugh. Did she spit up on your new blouse after you fed her? Laugh. You forgot to put a bib on and he puked on the car seat (which now has to be washed) and you are late? Laugh. You can't get through the first few months with a newborn without laughing at the circumstance or yourself. It will help you stay sane. At one point you may want to cry and that's OK too. Not everything is peachy with babies so if you have to let your emotions roll, have yourself a good cry and then go back to looking at everything with a smile.
4. Get Into a Routine
It's hard to have a schedule with a newborn baby. There is nothing set in place. They may decide to sleep four hours one day, and then only hour the next. You do not need to be watching the clock but it's good to have a routine. Babies are unpredictable but getting them into a rhythm will help you later on. I do not have a set schedule because everyday is different but we do the same things every single day (ex. bath, massage & tummy time).
5. Ask For Help
When I was a first time mom, I felt like I had a lot to prove to the world. I didn't want people to think that I couldn't do this mom-thing. Let's be honest, it's hard doing it alone and no on expects you to. Whenever you feel overwhelmed or just plane tired, ask for help. No one will have the heart to refuse a mother with a newborn. Trust me. Don't think that asking for help makes you weak or incapable of taking care of your baby. Life with a newborn is super exhausting. Sleep whenever (and however) you can, don't forget to eat and get away for a minute. Let family members take care of the baby while you sneak in a little nap, or escape for a shopping trip.
Hope these help whether you are a veteran or a first time mom. Babies are amazing so enjoy them because they grow up way too fast to be worrying about little things.
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