The Gentle Reminder

When everything is going well, we do not appreciate or take the time to enjoy what we have. We brush things off, ignore people and pass by our children being busy with who knows what. We just keep on living without realizing how much we have, how fragile life is and how it only takes a second for everything to come crushing down. 

We had a health-related scare with our little guy. As first time parents, we were freaked out and frightened. We didn't know what was going on and at the time, everything seemed possible and scary. After a short visit to the E.R. we were relieved with a mild diagnosis and went home with a thankful heart.

As we put the little guy to sleep and the house turned into silence, we realized that everything could have gone much worse, that really, we have so much. With a tearful prayer and a thankful heart we were locked in the most intimate and lovable embrace. We were so so glad. We were happy.  It was the bittersweet realization that it's so good to have each other, that we really are amazing together, that we didn't crack under stress, that we didn't blow up or shout at each other. Also, a gentle reminder from the Lord to always be thankful, to live every day to the fullest, to be kinder to each other, to spend more time with our son, to make memories, to be happy in the moment, to be mindful of our hearts, to be sincere in our walk, to love the Lord our God with all our hearts. 

I believe God puts us through difficult things for a very specific reason. We may not know it at the time but among one of them is to make us appreciate the good times. We go through testing and trials to understand God's grace, to know that His love sustains and His mercy endures forever. It's the gentle reminders we all need. 

When A Household Is Sick

Unrelated shot when everyone was well and actually had time to take pictures.

Last weekend was part of 'it was the worst time of my life' story and it all started Saturday morning. 

I woke up feeling tired, achy and overall blah. I did not want to get out of the bed and had no appetite. Hubby was a sweetheart and got up with Jonathan while I got to snooze extra hour or so. We had plans with a few of our friends to go out of town. I hate to cancel on people, so we ended up going and had a great time. But by the end of dinner I was shivering and coming down with some awful chills, that the entire ride home I was jittery and cold. 

All night and the next morning I was ready to die. I had the worst chills and my body felt like I was run over by a train a million times. All that along with never-ending pain in my throat let me think I had the flu. Dear husband took Jonathan to church and cooked lunch, went to the store and got me medicine and fruit so I could stay in bed. I went to see the doctor  Monday morning and the diagnosis was strep throat.

Next day, hubby started getting down with same kind of  fever and chills. He was feverish all night and next day had the same diagnosis - strep. It had got to be the worst - both of us with a full of life and energy toddler. Shoot me now.

Two out of three people in our household had strep throat, so we quarantined ourselves inside the house without anyone in or out. Since strep is highly contagious and awfully painful, I'm was so worried about Jonathan getting it too but thankfully, he didn't. I wiped down the entire house with Clorox wipes and rewashed every utensil I used every day. We feeling better but still not totally there.

It was hard being a parent while being sick. 

When a sweet, babbling baby wanted to clime in bed with us and play pick-a-boo but all I wanted to do is bury my face in a pillow, it was hard. When he wanted to play with me and kiss me all over and I couldn't, it was hard. When he wanted to be held and carried but I was too tired to even get out of bed, it was hard. It was hard not to be physically close, kiss, hold and love my baby when he so desperately needed it. It was probably harder then going through the pain and ache and after only a day of being away from him, I realized how much I missed that sweet boy of mine.

So if anyone in your house is ever sick, stay away from them. Do not sleep in the same bed (even if they want to cuddle), do not share a glass (unless you sanitized it), do not give them a kiss goodbye (so cold, I know) and certainly, do not exchange any bodily fluids (wink). It's hard being sick and caring for a baby but when both are sick, it's even worse. Take that from me.

Thank you for stopping and hope your week is going better than mine!

Real Parenting

We had a taste of 'real parenting'. Jonathan has been an easy baby every since he was born - sleeping through the night right away, no colic, no ear infections or major spit-ups (thank God) and we've been spoiled. His bottom teeth came in without a cinch and we were thrilled. 

Fast forward two months and he was cranky, didn't want to eat from the spoon, constantly wining and wanting to be on hands. Once we realized that his top teeth are popping through, at least we could take some measures, stocking up on baby Tylenol and finger foods. As it would happen, hubby was working nights that week and I was alone holding down the fort. 

Jonathan had it rough with sleepless nights, bleeding gums and no solids. He didn't want the spoon because it hurt his gums, so he only ate the stuff he could pick up with hands. We were getting frustrated because he was practically living on formula, super cranky and needy. The teeth finally cut through and we were relieved to have the happy and easy-going baby back. He is sleeping through the night, eating as he supposed to and loving his independence again. 

Those hard times, sleepless nights and cranky baby really proved our marriage. When neither of us wanted to get up to get Jonathan in the middle of the night, when we were snappy and irritable, it took a lot more effort not to kill each other. Glad we didn't because I still kind of like this guy. Scratch that, I love him  and our life together. 

Jonathan //9 months//

I remember sitting in my PJ's right after I got home from the hospital, trying to latch you on (crying from the horrible pain) and thinking that this will never end. I will not survive this.

And here we are - nine months later, still alive and well.

You are making all kinds of babble noises as I'm typing away at the computer.

You are smart and fun kid to be around. You love books and every time I open a book you just love turning pages with me and looking at pictures. You play with books by yourself and attempt to turn pages on your own - so stinking adorable.

You are getting into e-v-e-r-y-t-h-i-n-g. There is absolutely nothing out there that doesn't look or sound interesting. Shoes, for example, are the best and you look to chew on them any chance you get.

You still only have two teeth and although the top gums look like they are a little swollen, they aren't coming out yet.

Since we have the luxury of having two living rooms, I bought a gate to keep you in a controlled and safe environment when I need to cook or get stuff done. You play in it for a while but it does get old, and you love to follow me around.

Your regular bed time is 8pm and usually you wake up between 4 and 6am for your bottle. Then fall asleep again until about 8 or 9. But of course the days daddy has a day off and we want to sleep in you will decide to wake up at 7am and proceed to demand to be picked up.

You are eating pretty much everything we do (although finger foods are your absolute favorite). Whenever I'm cooking, I don't add seasoning until the very end and puree your food then season ours.

You have the most adorable and funny laugh and everything is a game. We play and laugh, and read, and goof around together - I'm loving this stage the most.

You love going shopping and sitting in the cart like a big boy, looking around and grabbing pasta boxes any chance you get. You barely fit in your carrier car seat  and it makes me sad that you are growing so fast.

Bath time is a daddy duty and your absolute favorite - you squeal when you see shower start. You two have a lot of fun together, judging by all the laughing that's going on in the bathroom

You finally learned to hold your own bottle and now it's a lot easier putting you down for a nap, although sometimes I let you fall asleep without a bottle.

You have an easy-going personality and as long as you are fed, changed and rested - all is well with the world. You are starting to show your toddler side and definitely will let everyone know when you don't like something - we are working on it.

As much as I can, I'm teaching you the meaning of 'no' and that I mean it. Most of the time you understand it but still keep coming back and doing the same thing over and over again. I'm definitely learning patience.

You love going to new places and stranger's houses don't intimidate you at all. Really, anyone can babysit you and you will have no problem with it. Especially you love being spoiled by grandmas.

You are crawling and cruising everywhere you can, and I don't think walking is too far away. You can get places a lot faster by crawling so walking isn't on your To Do list right now.

Out of all the different stages and changes you have been going through, I'm enjoying every moment. Seeing how fast time flies and you will never been this little again, I'm doing my best to take in every moment, not to complain and just enjoy the life right now. 

Life Lately, In Pictures

This is our life. 

This smiling face, curious gaze and lots of kisses.

Have a great day!

Jonathan //7 months//

How fast does the time fly! 

When you were born and I was constantly nursing you and changing your diapers every two seconds, it felt like the routine would never end. Yet here we are seven months later with you sitting, eating solids, desperately trying to crawl and talk.

Your bottom two teeth came in just the other day without fever, drool or much wining. The night before, you woke up about five times and I was getting aggravated and tired of it. After picking you up the third time, changing your diaper and nursing you, I decided it's time for you to sleep. You wined for a little bit and fell asleep. An hour later you woke up again, and then again. I bet it was probably uncomfortable but you got through it.

You are really trying to crawl and most of the time just want to stand up. Last night you took your first step on all fours and daddy and I about to have had a party. You are so active and curious, always looking and exploring things. 

You have the most adorable and funniest laugh. We play and cuddle, I read to you and make animal noises and you just crack yourself up. 

Most nights you sleep 8pm - 7am but if you had a lot to eat, you do wake up once in the early morning with a super soaked diaper. I change you quick and put you back to sleep, after a quick nursing session.

You are easy going and happy kid unless you are a) hungry b) tired c) have a dirty diaper. If all of the above are done, then you are a happy camper. Although, you still don't want to hold your bottle on your own.

You love taking walks with me. Every morning when we go for our stroll, you just look around and don't make a peep. About half an hour into it, your start getting tired and fall asleep. I get my exercise and you get your nap.

Daddy and you have a special bond going on. Your father loves spending time with you and playing with you. You are his 'little buddy' which is always sweet to see.

You are in 12 months clothes now and growing by the minute it seems. I don't know if you are even going to fit into the clothes I bought you for the winter. Your weight is average but with height you are in 75th percentile.

You still love to nurse and be near me. I love to hold you when you are sleepy and almost falling asleep on my chest, sweetly sighing and closing your eyes. I put you on my shoulder and press my cheek against your soft baby skin and just don't want to let you go. I want to capture and sear that moment into my brain to remember it and hold it in my heart forever.

 I love this stage and want to just stop the time and enjoy your sweet little smiles with two little teeth, and hold you in my arms a little longer, before you try to run away.

Love always,
 mom and dad

Babies Make Your Heart Grow Softer

 

Once you have a kid, everything changes. I mean, everything. 

Your priorities shift, or at least they should.
You start asking people where they bought their strollers and begin thinking about what you are going to leave to your kids after you are gone.

Most of all, though, you change your perspective on child rearing.

Before you have kid(s) their cry seems endless, their whining annoying and their smiles - dorky. After you have a kid of your own, it seems that every cry is a call for help, every whine is just cute babble and every smile is pure joy.

Then you realize what you think you know about raising kids and advice you offer has zero ground, no matter how many parenting books you read. You don't know squat.

You start getting more patient, kind, soft spoken, caring and gentle. 

You stop judging other moms in the grocery store whose kids are having a melt down. 

You stop giving looks to parents whose kids don't want to eat anything except hot dogs and cereal.

You don't look down on mothers who bribe their kids with cellphones and ice cream.

You don't roll your eyes at moms who breastfeed for two years because their child refuses to wean.
You don't judge mothers those don't breastfeed at all.

You don't criticize parents who can't go to public places with their chillins.

You don't because you understand, for the very first time, actually how hard this parenting thing is, how much it changes who you are.

These little chubby, adorable human make you softer. 

They bend and twist your heart in the ways you haven't imagined before. 

They make your heart ache when you are away from them.

They make you cry when they cry.

They melt your heart with their smiles.

They make your heart skip a beat with every milestone.

Babies. They are true God-given blessings.
And they make your heart grown softer with every passing day.

Jonathan // Four Months//

Oh my, how the time flies!

Dear Jonathan...

You are four months old and growing like a weed. So many things are changing, so many things are happening.

My dear boy, sometime in the last four months I managed to fall in love with you. I love you more then anything else in the world. You are my baby boy. 

It was hard for me to say that I loved you when you were first born because love is something that grows over time, something that needs constant attention and care. I've nursed, changed, bathed, rocked, burped, carried, kissed, held you since the day you were born, but only now I realize how much I love you.

You definitely have a calm personality and very content to be in one place for some time. Although you absolutely love looking around and always inspect everything with your curious gaze. 

We dubbed you Curious George.

You are very patient. When I need to get boogers out of your nose, you don't even make a peep. Just hold your breath for a little bit while I do it and bounce your heels on the bed. Such a trooper. 

You love taking baths and excitedly move your feet, splashing the water. If you are a little fussy, all I have to do is draw a bath and you quiet right down. 

You went through a growth spurt last week and let me tell you, I'm so grateful that you've been sleeping through the night all those months. Only couple of days waking up every two hours wiped me out. I don't know how those mamas do it for several  months. I'm so blessed and you are such a good kid.

You do not like the car seat but as soon as I start driving, it's all good. 

You haven't been sick or allergic to anything which is a great blessing.

It's interesting to watch you on your play mat, as you try to reach and grab toys - always such a serious face. You don't like strangers and only want your mama, but you started smiling at grandparents, aunts, uncles and cousins recently. 

My mom's neighbor wanted to look at your chubby little face and peeked into the car while you were inside and you got scared. Started crying for real - with tears. I felt bad for the lady who wasn't sure what she did wrong and didn't want to tell her that you are such a scared little monkey. Gotta toughen you up a little, boy!

You are still eating like a champ - 2-3 hours during the day and sleeping through the night. You love nursing and nothing comes in place of a boob for you. Can't fool you with water or pacifier either.

I gave you a little oatmeal cereal to try and you weren't thrilled about it but then gobbled it up. Also, black currant juice with water was kind of sour; you made the cutest face but kept drinking it. So funny.

You love when I play with you and blow raspberries on your time while I'm changing your diaper. You roll from your tummy on your back and from your back to your front, which is pretty impressive in your age. You have a real laugh now and a super deep voice. Your baby talk is more of an old man complaining about his arthritis babble and it's super adorable. 

You are not fussy and very easy going, and a huge blessing in our lives.

Daddy and I love you. 

Brutiful Reality

Here is behind the scenes look.

"I just want to have that boob already" 
Parents trying to take pictures when baby wants to have lunch 

 "Stop with the pictures and take me out of this stupid 
car seat already" 
Pictures after a long ride in the car 

"I was cute and cuddly, and I wore your stupid bowtie Ma, 
now can we get this over with?" 
Too many pictures when everyone wants to hold the baby 

 "Seriously folks! You put me into a jacket and a collared 
shirt and expect me to like it?"
 Taking pictures after a long day at church and out  

It's not always pretty.

Sometimes, babies don't make those adorable, precious and beautiful pictures happen.

Babies have a mind of their own and absolutely no schedule.

Parents are trying to go by the clock and babies... well, who knows what they go by. Mostly, the positioning of the moon and their hungry tummies.

When the two try to co-exist in one world, life gets messy.

And I am a real mama trying to navigate in the midst of dirty diaper, couple sleepless nights and an always-hungry stomach in high heels and couple designer handbags.

My life is not a perfect Instagram picture.

My life is sometimes brutal and always amazingly beautiful.

It's Brutiful.

And I love it. Well, Most of the time.

Have a great weekend!

//Jonathan// Two Months

Dear boy,

you are eight weeks old now and I don't know whether to count every four weeks from the day you were born or just the 13th of every month, I mean it's just a technicality.

You are growing oh so fast and changing almost every day. 

You started smiling and love to 'talk' to us. Whenever I start baby talk you focus your eyes on my face and try so hard to imitate what I'm doing with my mouth.

I love that toothless grin.

You have the most adorable babble talk, especially when I hear your daddy talking to you, as he's changing your diaper. For one, daddy takes his sweet time with you and really gets into it. It's so sweet.

You finally discovered the sheep mobile over your crib and love staring at it but I'm not sure it works to make you sleepy. 

You are nursing every two-three hours during the day which sometimes seems like you are always feeding (but that's only good for mommy's getting-back-into-shape ordeal. thanks buddy). On the other hand you sleep about five-six hours a night. So I'll take it.

I'm still trying to figure out which foods make you colicky and so far eggs and almost all greens are to be limited in my intake. 

We went out to eat once after church and you were such a good boy. An older couple sitting at an adjacent table was mesmerized by your cuteness. And who could blame them?

Then we went out with entire familia and you weren't thrilled, plus mommy forgot your paci. Sorry bud. I guess you don't like Greek food.

Also, we blessed you in church with pastor praying for you. It was a dear moment for us as parents.

I think in the last eight weeks we sort of got you used to being held a lot. You do not like to lay for long time and after about twenty minutes demand to be picked up.

That's going to have to change with some gentle discipline.

You do like to sit in a swing though which is, of course, a life saver.

You are one cute kid and we absolutely adore you.

I just wish you didn't have to grow up so quick.

This Guy

Jonathan recognized his daddy right away. Awake and alert when hubby was talking to him.
Amazing! 

I just want to take a minute here and brag about this guy a little. The bigger of two. I suppose there are many mushy and overly lovely-dovey blog articles flying all over the net but here is another one.

Bear with me.

First of all, I love this guy. 

His ability to make me laugh. 

His willingness to be there for me. Every time.

His strong beliefs and unwavering convictions.

His few wise words.

His adorable, most sweetest baby talk to our son.

His willingness to sacrifice for our family.

His ability to notice the little things.

His ability to do those little things that matter the most.

His lion-like guard of our family. Of me. Of our boy.

His ability to say the sweetest, most meaningful things looking deep into my eyes, taking my breath away. 

But most of all, his natural ability as a father.

The day I found out I was pregnant, I couldn't keep it in. I had these great plans in mind of how I would tell him, but I was in such a shock that it was written all over my face. I had a storm of emotions and a hurricane of thoughts going through me but he was there to let me pour my emotions out.

Mind you, he's not the kind of guy that will be jumping up and down with excitement but he will rejoices in quiet of his heart. 

Then the very first ultrasound he was with me. And the second and third. I mean, this guy has been with me every step of the way. 

Then when it was time to make the tough decision - induction or no induction - he was so supportive. He didn't rush me or push me towards a decision. He was ever so patient and understanding of my battling mind and never ending "I don't know".

Once in the delivery room he was on the edge of his seat (I could tell) although he breathed tranquil spirit. He calmed me and constantly reminded of my breathing and relaxation techniques. 

Then came the moment.

Moment he became a father. 

Like with everything, he accepted our son with calm adoration and was present every single moment of the day ever since. 

As a right of passage first diaper was on daddy ;-)

Now that we settled into our new life and living with a baby in the house has become somewhat familiar, I realized how much he actually means to me. How I couldn't do it all without him. Without his sweet words of encouragement and reassurance. 

He truly is my rock.

Of course, he isn't perfect and there are days when he annoys me and drives me up the wall but I wouldn't have it any other way. 

Our life isn't perfect. We have our ups and downs. 

We may not have it altogether but together we have it all.